Like Jan Brady and Lisa Simpson, Fall is often overlooked for its more high-profile siblings. Many simply think of it as the lackluster months that steal summer away and force us to wait for the holiday season. I, for one, am a fan of the middle-child season. Join me as I present Best of Fall 2007:
Hannah Montana leaves Salt Lake City:
I have nothing personal against the Disney phenom and offspring of Mullet royalty. I simply feel like repaying her the favor and walking into her work with my camera crew and hordes of assistants and bossing her around. Maybe I’m the crazy one who hasn’t fallen for Lizzy McGuire: The Next Generation. After all, she did sell out in 10 minutes, which, to my knowledge, is faster than anyone in Arena history including U2.
‘Psych’ the show:
I discovered a rerun of this gem early one Saturday morning on USA. I like to think it was destiny because, hey, why would I be up early on a Saturday morning? If you haven’t seen it, the premise of the show involves, Shawn, a highly observant young man who passes himself off as a psychic detective to help solve crimes for the Santa Barbara police. He is, or course, assisted by his best friend Guster who sluffs his day job as a pharmaceutical rep to help Shawn with his crazy cases. I strongly recommend you watch at least one episode. “When is it on,” you ask? I’m not sure, but I’ll ask my TiVo. He seems to know a lot about these kinds of things. If you’re not hooked after only one episode, accept the fact that you have a bad sense of humor, and go back to watching ‘Three and a Half Men’.
Gloria:
For those who haven’t met her, Gloria is the name of my new car. Gloria is short for “Glorious,” which is exactly how you feel when driving her. We’ve been together now for about two months, but it was love at first sight. I actually knew she was the car for me much the same way I knew Nikki right for me. She took my breath away the first time I saw her, I thought about her constantly and I still get nervous when other men get too close. Nikki, however, is less useful in teaching young punks that adding a noise-enhancing muffler and ridiculously large spoiler to your Honda Civic does not make it any faster.
Hot baths:
What can I say? Nothing beats slipping into a hot bath after a long day, especially when it’s cold outside. Yes, I am admitting that I take long, relaxing baths. I see no shame in it, especially since, contrary to accusations; there are never bubbles or candles involved. Why stand and cleanse when you can lie down and cleanse? Think about it. For those of you who have labeled bathing girly, at least I’m not volunteering to attend Josh Groban concerts or reading high-school romance novels. You know who you are...
Dan in Real Life:
Once I got over the fact that the leading lady’s face and Dane Cook’s unfuniness (not a real word, but it should be), I quite enjoyed this movie. I won’t spoil it for anyone, but ‘Dan in Real Life’ delivers warm fuzzies that can be enjoyed by the entire family. In addition, Steve Carroll proves that he’s not simply the funniest person on television today, he also a serious actor. He has to be to feign attraction for his love interest in the movie... bleech!
The Shins:
Quietly, the Shins have earned the title of my favorite band. Their rise to the top was aided in no small part by the poor showing of former favorite Rascal Flatts in their latest album. What I once dismissed as one of my little brother’s “We’re cool cause we’re different” indie bands is now the most played CD in my car. Who would have thought I would succumb to the melancholy drivel reserved primarily for high-school and college students? I know what you’re thinking, “The Shins are from Portland, and that’s why Brendan likes them.” Shame on you. Just because they too hail from the land of clean air, pure water and unrivaled beauty doesn’t mean I favor them.
Costco Chicken Bakes:
Are you a fan of delicious flavor? Affordable, portable and scrumptious, Chicken Bakes from Costco are the tastiest of the pocket foods family. Hot Pockets? Pitas? Breakfast burritos? Ha! Don’t make me laugh. So, the next time you’re buying that jug of gummy worms and Oprah book, do yourself a favor, and pick up a delicious Chicken Bake. Filled with chicken, cheese and what I refer to as “miscellaneous goodness”, you’ll enjoy every bite. It’s the best $2.99 you’ll ever spend.
Dance Dance Kid:
Lastly, I would like to pay tribute to the kid we saw flip the Dance, Dance Revolution machine at the District Movie Theatres game room in South Jordan. (See attached photos). I don’t know where he came from, but I’m sure it’s normal for the beings on his planet to hit 482 step sequences in a row. Kudos young, sweaty sir. You’re future is truly bright.
So, these are some things that make Fall great for me. I admonish you to look for the things that make this season great for you. But don’t wait, like Hannah Montana’s career and Nikki’s recent infatuation with vampires, Fall will be gone before you know it.
Hannah Montana leaves Salt Lake City:
I have nothing personal against the Disney phenom and offspring of Mullet royalty. I simply feel like repaying her the favor and walking into her work with my camera crew and hordes of assistants and bossing her around. Maybe I’m the crazy one who hasn’t fallen for Lizzy McGuire: The Next Generation. After all, she did sell out in 10 minutes, which, to my knowledge, is faster than anyone in Arena history including U2.
‘Psych’ the show:
I discovered a rerun of this gem early one Saturday morning on USA. I like to think it was destiny because, hey, why would I be up early on a Saturday morning? If you haven’t seen it, the premise of the show involves, Shawn, a highly observant young man who passes himself off as a psychic detective to help solve crimes for the Santa Barbara police. He is, or course, assisted by his best friend Guster who sluffs his day job as a pharmaceutical rep to help Shawn with his crazy cases. I strongly recommend you watch at least one episode. “When is it on,” you ask? I’m not sure, but I’ll ask my TiVo. He seems to know a lot about these kinds of things. If you’re not hooked after only one episode, accept the fact that you have a bad sense of humor, and go back to watching ‘Three and a Half Men’.
Gloria:
For those who haven’t met her, Gloria is the name of my new car. Gloria is short for “Glorious,” which is exactly how you feel when driving her. We’ve been together now for about two months, but it was love at first sight. I actually knew she was the car for me much the same way I knew Nikki right for me. She took my breath away the first time I saw her, I thought about her constantly and I still get nervous when other men get too close. Nikki, however, is less useful in teaching young punks that adding a noise-enhancing muffler and ridiculously large spoiler to your Honda Civic does not make it any faster.
Hot baths:
What can I say? Nothing beats slipping into a hot bath after a long day, especially when it’s cold outside. Yes, I am admitting that I take long, relaxing baths. I see no shame in it, especially since, contrary to accusations; there are never bubbles or candles involved. Why stand and cleanse when you can lie down and cleanse? Think about it. For those of you who have labeled bathing girly, at least I’m not volunteering to attend Josh Groban concerts or reading high-school romance novels. You know who you are...
Dan in Real Life:
Once I got over the fact that the leading lady’s face and Dane Cook’s unfuniness (not a real word, but it should be), I quite enjoyed this movie. I won’t spoil it for anyone, but ‘Dan in Real Life’ delivers warm fuzzies that can be enjoyed by the entire family. In addition, Steve Carroll proves that he’s not simply the funniest person on television today, he also a serious actor. He has to be to feign attraction for his love interest in the movie... bleech!
The Shins:
Quietly, the Shins have earned the title of my favorite band. Their rise to the top was aided in no small part by the poor showing of former favorite Rascal Flatts in their latest album. What I once dismissed as one of my little brother’s “We’re cool cause we’re different” indie bands is now the most played CD in my car. Who would have thought I would succumb to the melancholy drivel reserved primarily for high-school and college students? I know what you’re thinking, “The Shins are from Portland, and that’s why Brendan likes them.” Shame on you. Just because they too hail from the land of clean air, pure water and unrivaled beauty doesn’t mean I favor them.
Costco Chicken Bakes:
Are you a fan of delicious flavor? Affordable, portable and scrumptious, Chicken Bakes from Costco are the tastiest of the pocket foods family. Hot Pockets? Pitas? Breakfast burritos? Ha! Don’t make me laugh. So, the next time you’re buying that jug of gummy worms and Oprah book, do yourself a favor, and pick up a delicious Chicken Bake. Filled with chicken, cheese and what I refer to as “miscellaneous goodness”, you’ll enjoy every bite. It’s the best $2.99 you’ll ever spend.
Dance Dance Kid:
Lastly, I would like to pay tribute to the kid we saw flip the Dance, Dance Revolution machine at the District Movie Theatres game room in South Jordan. (See attached photos). I don’t know where he came from, but I’m sure it’s normal for the beings on his planet to hit 482 step sequences in a row. Kudos young, sweaty sir. You’re future is truly bright.
So, these are some things that make Fall great for me. I admonish you to look for the things that make this season great for you. But don’t wait, like Hannah Montana’s career and Nikki’s recent infatuation with vampires, Fall will be gone before you know it.
2 comments:
Brendan, you crack me up! I have to say I am surprised most by the love of baths. I'm pretty sure Chris will have a few things to say about that... :) And don't knock the vampires... I love those books... so Nikki, you've joined the Edward fan club?! We'll definitely have to talk. SO GOOD!
Easy on the vampires, but I think I'll go with the werewolves...I hate being cold!!!
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